#001: A Runner’s Reasons
This is a little unusual for me.
The circumstances for my writing are unprecedented in the history of this little page.
It isn’t the end of the year and I’m not reviewing the past 12 months. I haven’t even ran a race that I can anecdotally recount for you, although I am in fact running one tomorrow… its the return of a recent favourite but more on that in due course.
Today’s entry is a little bit different…
This is unlikely to come as a shock to those of you who have met me more than once but, in between running races and training to train for those races, I spend quite a lot of time thinking about running.
And so, this is the first entry in what I hope will become something of a little side series, where I’ll attempt to empty my head of some thoughts on running that are a little wider in scope than just my reflections on recent races.
Disclaimer… I’m not aiming to give anyone advice. In fact, you should absolutely not listen to me, unless you want to know what not to do.
Im really just thinking out loud here…in my notebook…on your screen.
You know what I mean…
My hope is that I’ll simply leave you with an interesting running-related notion that you maybe hadn’t considered before. Or perhaps haven’t thought about in a while. Best case scenario you’ll message me with some clarity on these topics and then I’ll be able to sleep better.
So…
Why do you run?
And no, “I have a race to train for” isn’t the answer here
Why do you really run?
Why did you sign up for your first race? Why did you go back and sign up for a second?
What is it that gets you out of your day to day existence, into your running shoes and out the door.
Of course, the answer is profoundly personal to each and every runner out there, yet no one reason is any less powerful than another.
Viktor E. Frankl once said “Those who have a why can bear almost any how”
I’ve thought about this a lot over the past year or two as I’ve moved into running ultramarathons of increasing distance and demand… What is it that drives me through these events that usually equate to multiple marathons in distance?
After much coffee-assisted scribbling I think I have the words to answer - and I figured it’d be useful to clarify it for myself at least. I’m roughly 18 hours away from starting an aforementioned ultra, and I’m likely going to have to remind myself of this moment around the 15th hour…
I think I run because it grants me access to the best version of myself.
That version is calm, capable and confident, all of which are states I struggle to maintain on the daily. It does often feel I have two versions. The everyday edition that stresses and doubts and struggles to find the right words most of the time. And the other, that runs.
He succeeds.
He’s never had a DNF, and he can stand at the start line of a 100 km race with a straight face and simply think “okay.”
Then step forward, and succeed.
And after the running is done he fades again, leaving me with more indisputable proof that I am capable of things more difficult than the day to day.
I can bear the “hows” Frankl talks about.
But that’s enough rambling for one evening. I have a race kit to prepare. I’ll leave you to ponder the same question I’ve tried to, somewhat publicly, answer for myself. Seeing the answer clearly should make whatever you’re training for a little more endurable.
So… Why do you run?…
(P.S. I’m conscious of the fact that there’s no photos in this entry to provide visual relief so here’s a picture of my coffee and notebook…)
